27 July 2016

Beauty // Recently Tried

Despite the fact that I talk about beauty all day every day, I still usually can't resist trying out new bits and pieces. I'm a total magpie for beauty things! Instead of giving them each a post, I thought I'd bundle them all together and let you know what I think.

H&M Facemask Pods

H&M Beauty Face mask Pods Review
H&M beauty have really upped their game havI'm a total sucker for cute packaging and face masks so absolutely no surprise that I picked up a few of these little face masks pods. Thoughts? Hit and miss. I loved the clay one (it smelt great, wasn't drying and left my skin feeling good) but the peel off ones? No, no, no. I think I am sensitive to alcohol in face masks and they made me go bright red and made my face sting so much I had to wash them off, take antihistamines and slather my face in unscented hypoallergenic moisturiser. So... choose your masks carefully! But at £3.99 per pod, alls well that ends well. It was worth an experiment! 

& Other Stories Fig Fiction Bodyspray and Highlighter

& Other Stories Fig Fiction Bodyspray and Radiance Cream Highlighter Review I could NOT resist this when I headed to the opening of the Manchester & Other Stories. This is one of my all time favourite scents. I love fig scents anyway but this one is so fresh and sweet. It smells like pure Summer to me and it is perfect. The opening was just before I nipped out to Cyprus so I was  very happy to see this little travel size body spritz. I've been using it every day since and I am very tempted to go and get the perfume...
As for the highlighter? Oh be still my beating heart. This is ridiculously beautiful. It adds such radiance and glow. I've used it all over under foundation, mixed into foundation and on top of my makeup and it works for all 3, ramping up the glow as you go. It works really well for boosting more matte foundations (which I really like to do in the summer) but I tend to dab it over the cheekbones before applying any powder. I really want the other shade already...

bareMinerals Skinsorials*

bareMinerals Skinsorials review
I do like a bit of bareMinerals so when their skincare range came out I really wanted to see what it was all about. Add in the rose gold and white packaging and I was in love. The textures of all of these are so good, from teh cleanser that turns white from red as you massage it onto your face, to the solid gel texture moisturiser and silky serum. Unfortunately, they did not agree with my skin and I broke out almost instantly and horrible. Don't you hate it when you really want to love something but it doesn't work out? 

RMS Beauty Buriti Bronzer

RMS Beauty Buriti Bronzer Review
RMS are one of those brands I've seen on instagram and american blogs for an age, especially after Miranda Kerr talked about them a lot at one point. The makeup products all use natural ingredients like Coconut Oil and Mica and I was really intrigued by the textures. This one I love. It sort of melts onto the skin and gives a gorgeous dewy bronze. I've been putting it along my cheekbones just below my highlighter and loving it. 

Lancer Lift & Plump Sheet Mask*

Lancer Lift & Plump Sheet Mask Review I do love a sheet mask. Not only do they have the benefit of freaking out my husband, but  I find them so soothing and hydrating on the skin. I loved the Sephora sheet masks but this is a different league of premium beauty. It smelt so good and I spent a whole evening just letting the serum soak into my skin. It left everything feeling so plump and hydrated. Love! If only I could afford one of these each week...

Have you been trying out any new bits and pieces recently? Any new favourites to share?



*PR Samples but my opinions are all my own. 

12 July 2016

Style // Culottes

nobody's child culotte jumpsuit Oh it has been a while hasn't it? What with being away in Cyprus, the nightmare ofBrexit and the shitstorm of bad news that has followed it, I really haven;t been in the headspace for blogging... As I said on twitter, I either seem to have all the words floating around but no photos or all the photos to taken and no words to string together... So, I'm going to try again to put together both words and photos and see what we can do here.

These last few months I've been trying new things. New places, being around new people, doing new stuff and trying on new silhouettes. It can be easy to get stuck in a rut and I've definitely felt a little like that this year so I've been trying to say 'why not' a little more. So, here is me, wearing culottes for the first time since I was in the Brownies and actually loving it!

summer loose floaty jumpsuit Relaxed summer hair and makeup Culottes and espadrilles Summertime staple outfit
Wearing- Jumpsuit: Nobody's Child; Espadrilles; Soludos via Coggles (currently on sale!)

I bought pretty much all of my holiday wardrobe from Nobody's Child but this jumpsuit has wormed its way into my everyday wardrobe with the help of a lightweight jumper. I love it too much to relegate it to only 20C+ days (there haven't been many since I got home..) The fit is perfect, I love the length and the pattern adds just the right amount of jazz to my usual black. It is love.

Seeing as it feels forever, fill me in on how you're been doing? How has Summer been treating you?



19 June 2016

Life // Thoughts on Grief

This post has been swirling around my head for a while and honestly? I'm not sure whether I will post it or keep it up for long but if your blog isn't a place to empty thoughts and feelings, then where is?

Grief is a funny thing. When I was young, I thought grief was crying over gravesides; a dramatic, overpowering sadness at losing someone that fades and then disappears. I've discovered that grief is not linear, going from huge to small in one neat line over a period of time, like I thought. Instead it undulates and twists, going quiet for months, sometimes years and then the most unexpected thing can bring it back, fresh and new as the day you first felt it. But grief is a private members club. Until you experience it yourself, you don't quite get it.

I became a member when I got a phonecall to say my dad had died, unexpectedly, as he went into work. I had sat my last exam of my first year of university that morning and none of us knew until my mum came home from work to a policeman. Then followed a hideous blur of trying to get back to halls from town, explain to harry what had happened without being able to say the words and then trying to get myself 300 miles back home to see my mum and my sister and to say goodbye to my dad.

I don't remember the fresh grief very well if I'm honest, that graveside grief that you see on tv shows. My mind has numbed that raw shock. I spent the weeks before the funeral drawing and handwriting all the programmes for his funeral to distract myself and then somehow we had to all live on in this new world. Somehow a year passed and I don't remember much at all of how I felt or what I did, or how I behaved. Life went on, I had birthdays, sat exams, moved houses, all without dad around and with my mum and sister in their own worlds of loss. We did cry at his graveside, but the grief has been so much more than that.

It was only after a year or so that I started being really aware of that quieter grief that carries on and sits gently in wait. What I realised is that I was not and am not sad all the time. I do not spend all my days feeling the loss and feeling sad. But the sadness is still there, biding its time, waiting for the oddest moments to hit.

I didn't cry on my wedding day without my dad. I didn't cry when I graduated (twice) and he wasn't there. I don't always cry on the anniversary of his death and I don't get sad at Christmas- I mainly think about all the food! Father's day isn't the worst. All of the expected 'difficult days' usually aren't that bad for me.

But there are moments where it comes back and hits me so hard it is like being winded. Like the first time I had to drive a different route across country and realised I couldn't ask my dad and his inner a-z for the best way. Like when I ran out of diesel late at night after working on a set and couldn't remember how to bleed the injectors to get the car going- I sobbed like a little girl because he had shown me how to do it and I couldn't call him to remember. Sometimes I get a jolt of shock when someone walks down a busy street wearing the same shirt as dad always wore. I often find the perfect present for him in a shop by accident and feel that perfect happiness before it hits that there is no point in buying it. The most unexpected moments can bring a wave of anguish.

This year, on the anniversary of dad's death, I cried more than I have in years. It wasn't the day itself. It was that I had to calculate how many years it had been since he died and the fact it has been 7 years hit me hard. It dawned on me that at 27 now, almost all of my adult life has been lived without him. Without him really knowing me and without me getting to know him. It was the realisation that I will live so much more of my life without him than I ever did with him. The realisation that I can already barely count the years, remember his voice or picture his face clearly, when I have decades of unlived life still ahead. I cried and cried, then I went to work and carried on living, with the grief settling quietly in again as I laughed and smiled with friends.

I'm aware now that this strange grief will always be around. I may be 90 and still see something that brings tears into my eyes and an ache in my heart. I know that other losses will add to this over the years, that I will go through that pain and sadness all over again, and it is terrifying. But I also know that it will ebb and flow and I will live alongside it. It doesn't stop joy or fun or excitement or all the other good things that you feel as you live. I just miss my dad and sometimes I wish it was all as simple as I thought it was when I was younger.